Sparks Lake is a large, shallow, trout lake located on the northwest edge of Mount Bachelor, and is the first of the high lakes you see from the Cascade Lakes Highway west of Bend. The views of South Sister, Mount Bachelor, and Broken Top are breathtaking.
Breathtaking is putting it mildly. It’s a huge big shallow lake that you can see the bottom clearly. Mount Bachelor looms around the entire Lake. It was snow capped when I went. I got to go with two very special in my life. It was a birthday gift from them. The peace of the lake was uncanny and the sun beat down on us as we paddled through the volcanic rock. I had never been in that lake but I have to tell you, I can’t wait to get back there again. I will never forget that amazing day.
The lake was so quiet like we were the only ones on it. I sat in awe at the Beauty that surrounded the lake. I also got to see a bald 🦅 eagle take a fish from another bird right in front of our eyes.
I have a photograph of Sparks Lake on my wall in my home that often reminds me of that amazing day. The beauty in the high desert is amazing. I especially love the 3 Sister mountains.
Do you have a favorite place that brings you such peace that you can close your eyes and feel like you are there?
God promises us that no matter what happens He is with us. He will always be in the boat with us. We will still go through trials that’s just part of life. Many trials I’ve been through have made me into the woman I am today. Would I change that. I don’t know. What I went through was horrendous but it’s given me the biggest heart and I so understand those children that have trauma in their lives and I understand. I also know what they need and it’s amazing to watch those children transform. I love that I can ask the right questions and be able to help make someone’s day a whole lot better.
Yesterday I was on my way to see a new counselor and I had been feeling the tightness again about money. It seems like I never can make enough to sustain my lifestyle and that’s just basic living. I’m waiting to go into cheaper housing and I thought maybe there was a space coming up but that will be for me to wait longer. It’s in God’s timing so I’m good with that. I like where I live now but rent in this town is outrageous. On my way I drove in one of my favorite roads and as I was driving to my right I saw this cool stump and on the top of it was a huge bald eagle. Wow I wish I was not driving so I could have stopped and taken a photo but it’s etched in my mind.
Those who know me, know that God sends me bald eagles just when I need them. They show me that God is near and that there is nothing to worry about and that He’s always looking after me. Yes he’s proven that so many times over. I’ve seen some amazing bald eagles. I don’t see them often but I see them and then it reminds me that it’s going to be all right. I often feel the hair stand up on the back of my neck. It’s the coolest feeling. ” For centuries, people have seen eagles as a symbol of beauty, bravery, courage, honour, pride, determination, and grace. This bird is important and symbolic to humanity because of its characteristics.”
For me it’s that reminder that God is with me and I’m going to be ok. God meets all of my needs. I continue to trust Him in all things in my life. Proverbs 3: 5, 6 reminds us to “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on. your own understanding; in all your ways submit to. Him, and He will make your paths straight.”
Next time you feel that God is not there, He’s there and He always is with us. Reach out to Him. What ways do you see that God is there for you?
Love and trust are the key elements you need especially when you work with vulnerable people. Without trust you have nothing and you can’t move forward without that. Sometimes it takes a long time to build that trust. They want to know that you will be there for them no matter what they do.
This brings me back to my childhood and how I distrusted adults. They had proven over and over again that they could not be trusted. Love does win over that theory. I loved school so much even though I didn’t learn much. I came to school to get away from the crappy home I was in. I loved it but it was often confusing for me. So many emotions but I kept them close to me. I never mentioned a word of it to anyone. This was partly because I had challenged my family one day and said I would tell about what what happening in my home and my dad told me that if I did I would be taken away and I would never see my family again. That terrified me so I kept my mouth shut .
Years later I found out that teachers at school knew something was wrong in my home. I learned what teachers I could trust and ones what would call home and life would become even more unbearable. I would seek out the kind ones often. They gave me that love and kindness that I didn’t get at home. They believed in me. I wanted to go home with them. I see that in children I’ve worked with. They would rather join any home but there’s.
It took me a long time to gain trust from one of my students. When they see me now their face lights up and they come and give me a huge hug. They tell me that they were bad before but I tell them that their brain was needing help and now that you have it, you can choose how to make decisions that effect how your day is. They tell me that they have made good decisions and I tell them how proud of them I am and that what happened before was not their fault. There face lights up. I tell them often how proud of them I am. What a difference of who this child was to who they are now.
I look forward to my hugs everyday the check ins. It took a long time to get to where we are today but I never gave up even when it was so hard. I’m so glad that nobody gave up on me either. Sometimes it takes a lot of extra time, love and compassion to help us through. Love conquers everything.
So next time you feel like you can’t get through to someone. Keep persisting. It’s so worth it. Remember the foundation is Trust and Love.
Dementia makes your loved ones almost become a stranger. It strips one of who they used to be. It’s such a crippling diagnosis and it’s very hard to watch what it does. I feel sad and I cry often because I’m watching dementia take away a person I love so much. I see glimpses of the person every now and again but it’s so far and few between. I’m watching a person I love with all of my heart slowly disappear. I never imagined that this would ever happen. It’s not just with the person I know and love but I’m seeing more and more people diagnosed with dementia.
It tears apart families and it’s especially hard on our families. On Sunday I went to visit my dad with mom. When he saw me his face lit up and I asked for a hug and he gave me the biggest hug. I don’t know if he still recognized me but that doesn’t matter because he was connected to me. We had a great visit. He’s very confused which comes with the dementia. Dementia makes him look older then he is. I’ve noticed that he can’t read like he used to and he can only do things for short amounts of time.
This was a man who ran a whole entire fleet of people in his job and was really good at his job where he worked for 19 years. Now he struggles with the most basic tasks. I hate what dementia is doing to him. I never imagined we would be here with him.
So many changes so many things that we have had to do. I keep visiting him and spending the time I do with him. It’s precious time because we don’t know how long any of us have. I pray for him every night and it’s hard to leave him behind when we leave to go home, but we know he’s well taken care of. Until the next time I go and visit. I look forward to my hug and that smile that lights up the whole room.
Those who know me know that I love this place so much. It’s my home away from home. I first heard about Crystal Peaks when I was given a book called Hope Rising written by Kim Meeder. I was at a cross roads in my life whether I wanted God in my life or I would just walk away. The book was so hard to read but I couldn’t put it down. I cried throughout it all. It touched my life so much and it gave me Hope. How could a woman lose both her parents in a tragic way and not give up? She found her hope in Jesus. He was with her every step of her life. She found love through a pony 🐴 that helped her growing up.
She met her husband Troy and they wanted a ranch with horses but all they could afford was a beaten down cinder mine property. It was 9 acres. They rescued a couple of horses and her husband was a landscaper and was able to get free tree’s and plants to put on their property. Even the trees that looked dead from a fire had life in them underneath the black. The book is well worth it’s read. I also read a Bridge called Hope the second book in the series. I love how Kim writes it’s like your there in the story. The stories are amazing but make sure you have a Kleenex handy .
After I read those two books I wanted to meet Kim and Troy and visit Crystal Peaks. I never lost hope that I would visit. In 2009 I was able to visit the ranch. I went with my husband and a good friend of ours. Crystal peaks put on information clinics that you could go for 3 days and learn how to set up your own ranch. The first time I stepped on the grounds of the ranch. I felt surreal peace. It was uncanny and I had no idea why. I met amazing people that I’m still friends with today. The staff were amazing and I learned so many great things. In the barn they had a sign that said ENTER AS STRANGERS, LEAVE AS FRIENDS. Some of my good friends two in particular we are friends still today.
I also had the privilege to be able to go in 2010 again with my husband. Again I met amazing people one of them touched my life in a very profound way. Her name was Jenni. Jenni had lymphoma cancer. She didn’t look sick. We bonded immediately and she loved the Lord more then anything. She talked about her children and how much she loved each of them. I kept in touch with her and prayed for her often. God took her home eventually. I was devastated. She was not just a staff member at the ranch but had so many other jobs as well. Before the cross you see there was put up when her family came to spread her ashes ,I had the privilege of spreading them up there. It’s the highest point in the ranch and when you stood up there you could see everything. I call it the little piece of heaven. It’s glorious. The mountains are breathtaking. It was Jenni’s favorite place. Her son helped build the cross that is a favorite for many to climb up and sit up on the bench. It reminds me of you Jenni everytime I see it.
When I first came to the ranch it was 9 acres and were lots of horses that they have rescued over the years. These horses had come from horrific situations and their lives have been transformed by them coming to the ranch. The reach matched children and horses together and it’s so powerful the healing that happens for both the horse and the child.
Every time I get off the plane in Redmond, I know I’m home. Bend Oregon is in the high desert so it’s cold and snowy in the winter and really hot in the summer. I have had the privilege of watching the ranch grow from 9 acres to 100 acres. To be able to have both of the properties across the street from the ranch donated to them in full is truly amazing. God has blessed this ranch more then anyone could ever imagine. Families and children come and once a month families come and have a meal and participate in worship and hear an amazing sermon.
It’s called refuge one of my favorite things to do on the ranch. That and scooping poop . You know that’s therapeutic. I love the sound of children laughing on the hill and enjoying themselves.
Another outreach that the ranch provides is food for the families that come with all their produce that they grow. They also teach families how to can. Not only do they help ranch families but their neighbors as well.
So many things about this ranch I love especially all the friendships I’ve made. I’m praying that I can go this summer. Lots more changes have gone on and it’s time to go back and volunteer. Young and old volunteer there’s always lots to do. It’s a place where there is hope, redemption and healing for all who come.❤️
Yesterday was a good day but also a tough day. A reminder that one of our loved ones is in a stage of his life that well none of us imagined he’d ever be in. It’s really hard to see that. Yesterday we celebrated his 85th birthday in his care home. The immediate family came as well as a couple that my dad adores. For a couple of hours we got to celebrate him. As I’ve written before my step dad was one of the best things that had ever happened to me in my life. He’s my dad through and through.
We got him this cake he loved it so much that he wanted to carry it around. Thankfully he didn’t drop it. It was great watching him read his cards and open his gifts. One of the cool gifts was a kaleidoscope and my dad loved it watching the colors inside. I’m so many ways he’s like a kid. When we left he always gives me a huge hug. I’m so glad we could celebrate his special day. For that moment he was surrounded by his loved ones . It’s hard watching what dementia is doing to him so every moment counts whether he remembers it or not .
We went back to my mom and dad’s home to have a dinner. We remembered happy things about my dad. We dedicated our dinner to him. Since he’s gone to the care home their home has not felt the same. My dad’s presence is lacking in so many ways. I miss hanging with him like that. That will be the last dinner we will all have in that home because my mom is moving next month.
I hate dementia what it does to families. It rips everyone apart and not only is it confusing for my dad it leaves a huge gap in all of our lives. What I have learned from looking after my dad, spending tons of time with him is every moment is precious. Be in the moment because they forget. I would have great conversations with my dad and when he left the room we’d start all over again. I will never regret the time we spend together. Now it’s different but it’s still my dad and I like how he smiles when he sees me. He may not know my name but he knows who we are. Don’t take life for granted because we never know what will happen or where we will be. ♥️
So many changes lately it’s moving so fast that I can’t keep up with it. My family has been part of a community for 45 years. A lot of change has come in those years. This beach I know it so well and it’s part of my home. How many times I’ve walked in it looking for sea glass, rocks of all different shapes and sizes. Sitting on the logs and watching the people go by. Seeing the forts children have made. It’s so peaceful here. I’ve walked out so many times with my favorite person.
A community where I went to high school in. That was a long time ago. A home in a hill that was my first home when I moved from Ireland to Canada. The home where I found a family that I love so much. Many great memories. The next home down the hill right near the ocean. This beach was visited often by all who came to visit.
Change appeared all around us over the years recently new condos on the small street and the closure of a restaurant that’s been there for a very long time. I knew it when it was Mc Morrins restaurant.
Patrons of the oceanfront Beach House restaurant in Saanich are a step closer to being able to dine and dance the night away — again.
The former family-owned McMorran’s restaurant, a Cordova Bay landmark, was in business almost 90 years, offering dancing for most of that time to generations of families in the capital region. I remember the dancing when I was in high school. In 2010 Mc Morrins because known as the beach house and became a restaurant and a coffee shop the place was well known for weddings because it looks right out into Cordova Bay Beach and the water. It’s got magnificent views.
Last year it closed its doors for the last time and is up for sale so that more condos can be built there. The once cottage area is expanding into bigger homes and leaving that small community feeling. I love this area so much I’m planning to keep coming and spending time at Matticks for coffee and visiting the beach I know so well. I feel sad so much change and I miss spending time at the beach with my favorite person. This community will never be forgotten. It’s a huge part of my life.
Yesterday I was so touched by such love and tenderness. Growing up and not having that love and craving it so much was something I did. I didn’t get it at home with my parents so I sought it in other places. Even as young children we just want our families to love us. Imagine being 5 years old and your mom and dad both are caught in addiction and your living with a relative. One of your safe spaces becomes school because there are people that you can trust. I loved school because that is where I learned about love and how beautiful it is.
Imagine seeing a very loving family and all you want to do is go and live with them. You make up stories about their families because you so desperately want to be part of that. You start calling them mom and when you see them you hug them and want to be with them all the time. They have their own children but you see this mom opening up her heart to you. It makes you feel so good. All you want is your mom and dad to pay attention to you. Even though you have people in your life you crave the love of a mom. At 5 so many people have come and gone in your life including one of your siblings. You get let down often that leaves a deep scar in your life.
I remember feeling that exact same way and wanting one of my friends mom’s to take me home forever. Yesterday I stood in tears watching this lady be so tender and loving to someone who just needs love, compassion and reassurance. For us it’s survival. People will come and go in our lives that’s how life works. For that moment it sticks in your mind that you are loved. ♥️
7 years ago I forgave my dad for all that had happened to me growing up. It was the root to that held me in bondage to my addiction. Since forgiving him I have had 7 years of freedom. Even though it’s hard to forgive those that have hurt you for me it ended up in freedom. It also does not mean you will ever forget what happened. That is etched in my brain forever. A few years ago I connected with him and some of my siblings two in fact . The one sibling that I wanted to connect with does not want to. That’s been hard for me but I’ve not spoken to her in 35 years. Correspondence is sparce but at least it’s a connection and I’m ok with that. I am happy that I can write to my other siblings. I have nothing in common with them and they live a very different life then mine.
I think about if things had been different I wouldn’t be the woman I am today and I may never have met my mom. I got the short end of the stick with my family in Ireland. I lost all the relationships I had with them and now they know me as Sarah who lives in Canada. I’m not part of their daily lives . I’m bearly part of anything and that makes me sad all because of the choices our dad made.
I know things happen for a reason and even though I long to get to know my siblings I don’t ever know how that can happen. They were super young when I left and they were caught up in the craziness of what happened to my brother and I . They also don’t know the side that my brother and I do with our dad and their mom. I recently saw a post that my dad had written about how he supports children and how important they are in the world. I know he loves his children a lot but why was my brother and I treated so badly.
My heart has so peace now and I don’t feel like I used to. All I want now is some connection to these people. I’m glad I was able to forgive that could never happen without God’s grace and love. That is not something I could ever have done on my own. I’m super happy now in my life and even though the past is in the past , I still long that bigger connection with my siblings. I don’t know if that will happen in this lifetime. It’s a loss I feel in my heart ♥️
Maybe that connection would cause more pain only God knows that. For now I trust that what I have maybe is all I will ever have. I’m not sure how to have relationships with them. It always brings up lots of pain. I’m done with all that pain. As I write I realize that that pain took a long time to heal. God always knows what is best for His children.
Beauty from Ashes. 